


Unwanted Love

by Chenelle_SoLily



Category: One Piece
Genre: M/M, POV First Person, POV Vinsmoke Sanji, Seme Monkey D. Luffy, Uke Roronoa Zoro, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love, Unrequited Vinsmoke Sanji/Roronoa Zoro, Vinsmoke Sanji-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:00:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25817695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chenelle_SoLily/pseuds/Chenelle_SoLily
Summary: Vinsmoke Sanji saw something he shouldn't have; a secret relationship between his captain and the crews' swordsman. This leads to something Sanji never expected, an unwanted love for a certain someone.
Relationships: Monkey D. Luffy/Roronoa Zoro, Vinsmoke Sanji/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 54





	1. The Day to Forget

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place after Water 7, but before Thriller Bark. The crew just got The Thousand Sunny and now are headed towards Fishman Island.

The bar was eerily quiet, all of its patronages already having left for the night. Tables and chairs sat empty. Trash littered the ground, the smell of booze potent. A row of lights hung from the ceiling by thin wires, resting several feet above the wooden bar, their bulbs were aged, causing them to flicker every few moments. Smoke rose from the cigarette resting in the circular ashtray, its shapeless form dancing in a curled trail, dispersing into the hazy air which clung to the roof. The old building groaned and creaked as the outside weather grew even more furious. 

“Another one,” I mumbled to the bartender.

My face was flushed with a warm heat, my nose and ears a visible red, my head pounded with each heartbeat, my eyes barely focused on the myriad of empty glasses that laid in front of me. The bartender placed down another cup, filled to the brim with the thick golden liquid. I quickly gulped it down. It’s flavor rushed past my tongue, hardly giving me a taste as it hurriedly ran down my throat. The burning texture was harsh but had a tinge of euphoria.

“That’s your ninth drink. What’s bothering you bud?” The bartender asked with concern.

I placed my tired head onto the wood counter, resting it in my sore arms, the world tilted back and forth.

“I saw something I shouldn’t have.”

The events of today flashed through my mind. After settling into the Sunny, I finally had the free time to explore the soldier dock system, which I only got a glimpse of earlier. The small area was momentarily being used for storage - boxes and barrels cluttered the sides, only leaving enough room for a small walkway in the center. While looking through some old crates, I heard the recognizable deep grumble of Zoro’s voice. My body instinctively hid, wanting to scare the stupid marimo. Another voice perked, it was our captain, Luffy. Their conversation was hushed, no matter how hard I strained my ears, I could only hear their mumbles. 

I moved closer, still hiding, until I could hear them.

“Not here,” Zoro said.

“Why not?” Luffy responded, “No one else is here.”

“But what if someone comes down?”

“No one will.”

“Bu-”

Zoro was cut off. Curious, I looked over the crates and I saw the two of them connected. Their lips massaged over each other, their teeth clicked against one another every time they touched. Luffy’s tanned hands tightly gripped Zoro’s hair, forcing the man against him. I ducked back behind the crates, my body frozen, my hand covered my mouth, muffling my breaths. 

I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Warmth from embarrassment quickly embraced me, the heat creating sweat beads along my forehead. My mind raced. As I cowered I knew it was too late to reveal myself.

I looked over again, Luffy’s hands now snaked under Zoro’s shirt, raising the white cloth above his head. His dark pink nipples protrude out like flower buds, his muscular tan skin flexed with each movement. Luffy brought his mouth down and danced his tongue around the breast.

I hid again, my breaths becoming more panicked. The salty smell of sweat and other bodily fluids permeated through the air, thickening it, making it harder to breathe. 

Their moans grew louder, a rhythmic thump began, matching with the sound of the waves hitting the Sunny’s sides. I felt like I was dreaming, I even pinched myself to check, but I was awake and Zoro and Luffy were having sex. I stayed frozen. My sense of time was warped and I felt like I was there forever, but it couldn’t have been more than a few minutes.

“Zoro...Zoro... Zoro...” Luffy cried over and over again, each time in sync with their pulsation.

“Ah...Luffy, w-wait...stop..do-don’t go that deep,” Zoro begged.

As if my body had a mind of its own, I looked back one more time. Zoro was on his back, laying in the pathway, his legs raised, pants off, Luffy was angled above him, grappling onto the bottom’s hips, moving back and forth. Their pace began to quicken, Luffy pounding into him even faster. 

“I can’t hold it anymore,” Zoro said.

His thick white load shot out, drenching his own stomach and parts of his face. Luffy soon came after, his body collapsing onto Zoro’s. Zoro’s head laid against the floor, his face was directed towards me, but our eyes did not meet. 

I couldn’t look away from his shameful face. His silver eyes were pooled with tears, some trickling down. His cheeks were kissed a sinful red, his breaths were raspy and sharp, sweat dampened his green hair, gluing strands of it to his forehead. His reddened lips drew me in, they were swollen and covered in spit, but they looked appetizing, like a prime raw steak just waiting to be cooked. 

My chest tightened at the sight, my body became even hotter, the burning becoming completely unbearable. I ducked down again, my whole being was quickly filled with an odd adrenaline, my head felt hazy. 

“What did’ya see?” 

The bartender’s question snapped me back to the present. The image of Zoro’s face still lingered in my mind and ever since I saw him, his face has been ingrained onto the back of my eyelids. No matter what I do, how much I drink, or my will to forget, not a single detail has diminished from my memory.

“I-i’m gonna go,” I responded.

My body groggily moved as I stood up. The world spun around me. I threw a bag of berris on the counter and left the bar.

Only a sliver of the moon shone against the black sky, the stars stayed hidden behind the gloomy night. Freezing wind, originating from the ocean, roared with ferocity, my hair clung to my face. My stumbling body slowly made its way back to the ship. 

Franky was out on the main deck, patrolling the sides, keeping watch for anything. His blue hair blew in the wind. Although it was cold, he still wore no pants. Once I got onto the deck, he walked over to me.

“You were out super late, eh?” Franky asked, his tone implying something inappropriate.

“I just went drinking.”

“Really? That’s superrrr boring.”

Making my way through the library and up the ladder, careful with each rung, I entered the bathroom. My uncoordinated hands fiddled with the button on my pants, until I finally got it undone and stripped down. My toes curled at the touch of the cold tiles. The world continued to move; side to side, up and down. I barely kept up with its unpredictable movements. One foot after another, I walked a tightrope path to the shower, all of my attention focused on keeping upright. I knew I drank way too much.

Once I made it, I turned the metal faucet. Warm water immediately enveloped me. It poured down my sides, dripping onto my stomach, snaking its way onto my entire body, and finally falling onto the ground, where the drain drank it up. Thick steam filled the bathroom. Some of my drunkenness was washed away. The heat felt orgasmic as it trickled over my sensitive skin. Drunken arousal boiled inside me.

I looked down, my dick twitched with lust. I gently grabbed myself, my appendage still limp. Slow at first, I moved my hand up and down my shaft, my finger rubbing my tip. As I began to harden, my speed increased. A series of images flashed by: Nami, Robin, that blonde from the market, Zoro. 

Zoro? 

As Zoro’s face lingered, I stopped. Why? Why the  _ hell _ did I think of that idiotic marimo?

I tried to think about anything else, but his face wouldn’t leave. Frustrated, I left the shower and headed to bed.


	2. Denial

An aroma of butter filled the air. Sunlight flooded the room, revealing dancing dust particles. The whisk battered against the bowl’s edge as I mixed the flour and eggs. The metallic sound was calming, cooking helped relax my mind and allowed me to think clearly. 

It’s been a week, one  _ hellish _ week, since I saw those two. No matter how hard I tried, things haven’t been able to go back to normal. I can talk to Luffy just fine, but whenever I’m around Zoro, I can only stumble out a few words. It has to be because I saw his face in that humiliating position. 

I hate it. I hate his face, I hate how I can’t stop thinking about it, I hate how my heart twinges every time I see him. 

“Sanji?” A small voice peaked, interrupting my thoughts.

Chopper was standing next to my leg, tugging at my pants, looking up at me with his innocent eyes. 

“Hm?”

“You didn’t hear me, did you?” His voice sounded upset, “I said that we are coming up onto the next island.”

“Ah sorry, I was lost in thought.”

“Are you feeling okay? You’ve been acting weird lately, I can give you a check-up if you want.”

As he spoke, he squinted his eyes, as if he stared at me hard enough, he would be able to see some sort of sickness. His voice was filled with concern. 

“I’m fine Chopper, thanks for the offer though.”

I patted his head and gave him a slight smile. 

I am fine. He looked ridiculous, that’s why I can’t get his face out of my head, it's nothing more than that. 

Zoro entered the kitchen, his skin glistening with a layer of sweat, his muscles twitching after being worked hard. My heart skipped a beat and my head shot downwards, blood rushed to my face. Nervousness followed by nausea consumed me. I couldn’t breathe, it felt like a knot was tied in my throat.

“Where did you put the sake?” His voice was deep, his vibration shook my body.

“I put it in the cupboard over there,” my voice was meek.

I couldn’t look at him, my finger trembled as I pointed to the distant cupboard.

“Thanks.”

He opened it, scrupulously looking, and once he found what he wanted, he grabbed several bottles. 

“You shouldn’t drink after a workout,” Chopper nagged.

“It’ll be fine, I do this all the time.”

Their conversation continued, but I couldn’t focus, I just wanted him to leave. 

The moment the door clicked shut, I exhaled, finally able to breathe again. My body still felt light, my head fuzzy.

“Are you sure you're okay?” Chopper asked again.

“I’m fine, really.”

It’s just embarrassing to face him since I know his secret, that’s all. Anyone would be like this too, not just me. 

By the time we reached the island, the sun was setting. On the larger side, the island was flat and covered in giant oak trees. From the ship, you could see the lights of a large city shining like a beacon in the thick forest.

We anchored on a dark shore, hidden behind various boulders, on the opposite side of the city. Although it was hard being so far away from it, it was better than being chased off for being pirates.

“Imma go exploring!” Luffy shouted as he prepared to jump off the ship.

“Wait!” Nami yelled, snatching the collar of his vest, “You’ll do something stupid, wait until the morning.” 

“But I wanna go now,” he loudly whined.

Nami let out an annoyed sigh.

“Then bring someone with you.”

“Hmmm, then…”

The straw hat looked at each of our faces, his hand on his chin as if he was thinking hard about the decision, but I already knew who he was going to choose.

“...Zoro!”

He pointed at the marimo. Although his decision was expected, a wave of disappointment still washed over me.

“Huh?! Why do I have to go with you?” Zoro angrily asked.

“Cause’ I’m the captain and I said so!”

“No, I’m staying here.”

“I heard that this island is famous for its alcohol,” Robin said, her attention on the book she was reading.

“See? We should go together!” Luffy excitedly yelled.

“Fine, but I’m just going to a bar.”

“Anyone else want to go with those two?” Nami asked.

Nobody spoke up.

“Fine, then you two can go.”

Luffy energetically jumped off the ship and Zoro begrudgingly followed. My chest clenched as I watched their bodies quickly disappear in the darkness. 

With those two together, alone, I wondered if they were going to do it. I shook my head, trying to get rid of those thoughts. I thought of Zoro’s face and the sound of their grunts and moans replayed. I shook my head again.

“What are you, a wet dog?” Usopp asked, “You keep on shaking your head.”

“I-it’s nothing.”

My mind still raced. I began to walk, then quickly turned to a sprint.

“Actually I think I am going to go too!” I yelled over my shoulder as I jumped off the ship and onto the grassy shore.

Going in the same direction as they did, I ran as fast as I could. I didn’t know what I was doing. It was none of my business after all, but I felt sick, my stomach churning, and I knew it wouldn’t get better until I followed.

Entering the outskirts of the town, the bright lights blinded me, the place was like a metropolis, contrasting to the woods that surrounded it. My eyes scanned for a straw hat and a walking moss ball, but they were nowhere to be seen. Wandering the streets, the town was quite active, all types of people were out. 

I walked without direction, until I saw it, a familiar hat, and next to him, standing tall, was Zoro. The moment I laid my eyes onto him, my body instinctively hid. From a distance, I followed the two, making sure they couldn’t see me, using people and alleyways as obstacles. Luffy grabbed Zoro’s hand, Zoro tried to shake the grasp, but the straw hat was too strong, so he gave up the struggle. 

We continued down, getting deeper and deeper into the city, the two holding hands, constantly touching and laughing. As they reached the center, I realized we made our way into a red light district. On both sides of the street, poorly made brothels and cheap love hotels lined, but, at the end, there was a glamorous hotel. It was several stories tall, the roof was held by white columns, and it was obviously expensive. 

They stopped in front of it and began to talk, but I was too far away to hear them. Eventually, they entered it. I almost followed them in, but I froze. Knowing this endeavor was pointless, I didn’t even know why I followed them in the first place.

I let out a long sigh and lit a cigarette. Sitting down on the sidewalk in front of the building, my body felt numb. I watched as hundreds of pairs of feet walked past me, the owners’ personalities showing in their stride. The air was hazy and thick. 

A girl’s face leaned over me, her mossy-green hair almost touching her knees. She had a faint smell of cigarettes. 

“What’s that face for?” her voice was filled with a fluffy sweetness.

I stood up and faced her. She wore a revealing red dress, accenting her hour-glass figure, her olive skin spotless.

“Oh, nothing,” my voice was sullen.

“Hmmm, that’s a lie, but you don’t have to tell me anything. I just don’t like seeing that beautiful face of yours look so sad.”

She cupped my cheek, her skin was soft, her hand filled me with a comforting heat. She slipped her free hand into my back pocket, placed something, then took her hand out.

“How about I cheer you up in that hotel over there.”

Her thin finger pointed to the same fancy hotel as they were in. I checked my pocket and pulled out what she put in it, a condom. I let out a grin and grabbed her hand, leading her inside.

“I’m glad you're feeling better,” she laughed.

It was overpriced, the hotel being extremely nice, but it didn’t matter to me, I needed this. I needed to stop thinking, I needed my animalistic instincts to take over.

As soon as we entered the room, I pushed her against the wall. Our lips fiercely interlocked, our tongues rolling off each other, taking brief moments of breath. We stumbled our way to the bed. My hunger was ferocious, I needed to eat, and it didn’t matter who. 

We fell onto the mattress, my hands forcibly taking off her clothes, hers ripping off my pants. Pinning her arms above her head, I rose above her, positioned between her raised legs, her breast exposed. I leaned down and kissed her again, my tongue forced its way in, bruising her lips, and swirled with hers. Her hair smelt of lilacs. 

“You're rough, I like it,” she growled in between gasps.

I grabbed her breast and harshly squeezed. I brought my mouth down and massaged her nipple. Her moans were loud. They gave me a headache. I covered her mouth.

“Keep quiet,” my voice was coarse. 

“You're quite demanding,” she said with a smile.

“I said quiet.”

I forced her legs up and yanked her closer. With my teeth, I ripped open the condom and unfurled it onto my hard dick. I entered her, the warmth sending shivers down my body. I rotated my hips into hers, the smacking of our thighs echoing loud. 

The image of Zoro drinking popped into my mind. 

I pounded harder. 

_ Him smiling. _

My pace quickened.

_ Holding hands with Luffy. _

Her muffled moans filled the quiet room.

_ Them kissing. _

The sweat on her hips loosened my grip.

_ Luffy touching him. _

I banged into her, her moans turned into cries.

_ His breathtaking silver eyes. His silky green hair. His flexing skin. His dark nipples. _

“Zoro,” I quietly moaned.

“Zoro...Zoro...Zoro...Zoro…” my moans grew louder and louder.

_ His red face, covered in tears and bodily fluids, his parted swollen lips. _

I climaxed and collapsed onto the woman. Tears began to roll down my cheeks.

“Why...why can’t I get him out of my head?” I cried.

She sat up and cradled me in her arms. My sobs became louder as I cried into her bare chest. 

“Why am I haunted by him? Why won’t he just go away?!”

She stayed silent until my sobs stopped.

“I don’t know you or your situation, but obviously this Zoro guy is important to you,” she began, “I know I shouldn’t talk on behalf of your feelings, but it’s pretty obvious that you like this Zoro guy, might even say you love him.” 

I couldn’t love Zoro, it was impossible, after all, he’s just a stupid marimo who can’t even go out for a walk without getting lost. He’s someone stubborn and impossible to work with, someone who does stupid self-sacrificing things, someone who pushes himself harder than everyone else. It’s impossible, I can’t love Zoro. But then, why does my body hurt whenever I see him? Why do I want to see him smile? Why do I want him to make those noises, that face, he made Luffy, but for me instead? 

The woman stood up and headed towards the bathroom.

“At least, that’s just my opinion,” she added.

The sound of rushing water filled the room. I sat on the bed’s edge alone, my thoughts consumed. I placed my head into my hands. 

“I... love...Zoro?” I quietly mumbled to myself.

“I… love... Zoro,” my voice was louder.

“I… love Zoro.”

The realization dawned on me.

“I love Zoro.”

I jumped up with excitement. 

“I love Zoro!” I practically shouted.

I do love Zoro. I love his devotion. I love his strength, his aspirations, his face. I love every part of him. And, although, he can be stupid, I love his stupid.

I sat there, body and face flushed, confused about what to do. She left the shower and I hopped in. After cleaning myself, I put my clothes back on and re-entered the room, where she sat on the bed, dressed, smoking. She handed me a cigarette.

“What now?” I asked while rubbing my tired face. “What should I do?”

“Tell him.”

“But he would never accept me.”

“You don’t know that.”

She gave me a reaffirming smile. I smiled back. She’s right. If he could love Luffy, then maybe he could love me.

“I should go back.”

I reached for my wallet and took out several thousands of beris.

“Here’s payment,” I mumbled.

The woman looked at me strangely.

“Keep it.”

“But-”

“I’m not a prostitute,” she laughed.

My face turned red with embarrassment.

“Oh...sorry.”

“It’s fine, I hope you figure out whatever situation you’re in.”

She exited the room and I followed soon after. 

Red streaks broke through the dark sky as I made my way back to the ship. A silhouette stood tall on the deck. As I made my way on, I realized that it was  _ him _ . No one else was around, my head clouded with nerves.

“Where have you been?” Zoro asked.

We stared at each other for a moment, his silver eyes were intense. I knew I had to tell him and I knew now would be the best time, while we were still alone, away from Luffy. His face was a shade of cherry, his white shirt off, exposing his chest, his short hair messy. 

The sun was on the horizon, the light giving the world a red tinge. The mood was perfect. I was about to speak, my lips starting to move, but I noticed something; on his olive chest, right below his breast, a noticeable dark mark showed he was already claimed.

It brought me back to reality. I was stupid to think that there would be any chance for me. My heart hurt. I walked right past him, getting a strong whiff of booze, ignoring his question. A yank on my wrist stopped me. 

“What’s going on? Why are you ignoring me?”

His calloused hands felt rough, his heat made me nervous. My legs felt weak. I couldn’t take it anymore.

“Let go of me.”

“Not until you tell me what’s wrong.”

He tightened his grip, his thumb bruising my joint. I turned around to face him. Surprising both of us, tears filled the corner of my eyes.

“I said let go of me!” I desperately yelled.

Shock took over his face. He loosened his grip and took a step back.

“S-sorry,” he sheepishly mumbled. 

I turned around and ran into the kitchen. I slammed the door behind me. My legs crumbled. I sat on the floor, back against the door, my head into my hands, and tears falling down my face.


	3. Acceptance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might have forgotten that I wrote this. Here's the final chapter after months. Thanks for waiting - if anyone cares.

“Oi Sanji,” A distant voice said.

My body rocked back and forth. 

“Sanjiiii,” the voice whined, “wake up.”

I peeked my eyes open. Outlined by the sharp light, the silhouette of a Straw Hat jerked about. Too tired to wake up, I shut my eyes. 

“Sanji, I’m hungry.”

Annoyed, I looked again. Luffy loomed over me, his face twisted into a disgruntled expression. As I stood up, my body rang with pain. I was still in the kitchen, back leaned against the door.

“Did you sleep here?” he asked.

Sighing, I rubbed my tailbone. 

“I think I did.”

“Guess you drank too much,” he laughed, “Anyway, make me food, I’m starrrrving.”

His energy surprised me - especially since I knew what he did last night. Even though he was my ‘competitor’, he was still my captain and someone I respected, I couldn’t leave him hungry. I went over to the kitchen, threw on my apron, and washed my hands.

“Any request?”

“Nope, I just want Sanji-made food.”

With the vague response and my pounding head, I kept things simple and whipped-up omelets. 

The eggs sizzled as I poured them onto the pan, the aroma of herbs filled the room. I felt at peace. 

More people awoke, and I ended up making breakfast for the whole crew.

Zoro was the last one to enter the kitchen. He walked in, disheveled. His hair tangled together, as if he had trouble sleeping, and his cheeks sunk into his face. We made eye contact. He snapped his head away and chose to sit next to Luffy. Their thighs touched. Luffy placed his hand onto Zoro’s knee. 

I brought the plates and sat across from the two. Everyone dug into the food. There was the usual commotion: Luffy stealing food, Nami yelling at him, Robin laughing, and Zoro drinking all the alcohol. It was loud. They all talked on top of each other. Their voices mixed similar to a broken machine - sharp and jangled. I couldn’t focus. Slowly chipping away at the omelet, I felt numb.

Zoro glanced in my direction every few seconds. He wanted to say something, I just knew it, but he never attempted to approach me. 

In minutes, the table was empty. Everyone split up, going their own way, except Nami, who stayed behind to help wash dishes.

We stood later to each other at the drop. Even though it was Nami, I didn’t want to talk. 

“What’s wrong?” She asked.

“Nothing.”

She lifted her hands out of the water and brought her attention to me. 

“That’s a lie. Normally you would fawn all over me, but you won’t even look at me.”

“I guess I’m tired.”

“Something happened, didn’t it?”

I didn't respond. I grabbed a dirty plate and wiped its face. 

“Something with Zoro?”

At the mention of Zoro’s name, I dropped the plate. It shattered. Sharp shards scattered across the ground. 

“Shit!” 

I got on my knees and began to pick up the pieces. Nami leaned down, helping me clean the mess.

“I was right, wasn’t I? What’s going on between you two?”

Placing the broken glass in my cupped hand, I picked up a large piece. It reflected my panicked face.

“Nothing happened.”

“Did you guys get into another fight? It’s better to talk about these things.”

“I told you already, nothing happened, so just drop it!”

The moments I spoke, I regretted it. I yelled at her - at Nami of all people. She went a step back, abashed at my tone.

“Ah Nami,” I began, “I’m sorry I-”

“Just leave,” she said, “I’ll clean this.”

The coldness in her voice made me hate myself even more. She went back to picking up shards.

“But-”

“You need some alone time,” she interrupted, “So leave.”

“O-okay.”

I stepped back and paused for a moment. My stomach churned. I wanted to apologize, I needed too. The words were on the tip of my tongue. I turned around.

“Go.”

She looked defeated. I couldn’t bear it anymore and left the room. Leaned against the wall, Zoro sat, bottle in hand, staring at the roaring ocean. He said nothing. He didn’t glance at me, but I knew he heard our fight.

I ignored him and went straight to the boy's room. I flopped onto my hammock, clenching my heart, and closed my eyes. 

  
  


The ship jerked back and forth as waves slammed against the walls, flinging me off my bed. I crashed onto the wooden floor, forcing me awake. Disoriented, I rubbed my eyes. A barrel rolled towards me, I jumped out of the way. It hit the wall and broke, spilling its content of rice and other reserved foods. 

Trying to keep on my feet, I stumbled my way to the main deck. The moment I cracked the door, the wind flung it open, banging it against the wall. Everything was dark, it was like a starless night. Black clouds, stacked upon each other in waves, blocked the entire sky. Lightning streaked across in a jagged line followed by ground shaking thunder. I stepped out and got drenched by the piercing rain. 

Everyone was running around, following Nami’s orders. She stood on the upper deck, shouting in a clear voice. Her yellow raincoat did nothing to prevent the rain as she was soaked. I went up to her, using my arm to shield my face. 

“What should I do?!” I yelled.

I couldn’t hear myself.

“Just sit down!”

She didn’t look at me when she gave me the command. Before I could protest, she ran off to help Chopper, who struggled with the mainsail. I looked around to see if I could help, but everyone had it under control. 

Feeling useless, I listened to her orders. I went to the kitchen and sat at the table, placing my head in my hands. Water dripped from my hair and onto the wooden surface. I watched the puddle grow as the rocking grew calmer.

The door flung open and Nami, soaking wet, entered the kitchen. I rushed to her side. Begging, I bowed near her feet.

“I’m sorry, I really am,” I cried, “I shouldn’t have yelled at you, I was just taking out my frustration. You don’t have to forgive me, I just needed you to know how sorry I am.”

She stayed quiet for a moment. She was angry, I just knew it. I was scared she would never forgive me. 

“It’s okay.”

She crouched to my level. 

“I’m not angry,” she wiped my tears, “I’m just concerned. You’re not acting like yourself, and I’m not the only one that’s noticed. Chopper, Robin, Franky, Usopp, and even Zoro have mentioned how off you’ve been. I’m here for you - we’re all here for you if you need us.”

She smiled. 

My heart skipped a beat. Unable to hold back anymore, I said the words I’ve been dreading.

“I’m in love with Zoro.”

“Huh?” She stood up and took a step back, “I-I think there's something wrong with my ears. For a second there I heard you said you're in love with Zoro.”

I stopped to think. If I wanted to back out, this was my chance. I took a deep breath.

“That’s what I said.”

I did it. I told her the truth. Her eyes widened.

“B-but I thought you like women?”

“I do.”

“and you love Zoro?”

“Yes.”

She began nervously laughing.

“I assumed you and Zoro were fighting over something stupid again, this is not what I thought.”

“It’s not what I expected either. I didn’t even realize it until recently.” 

There was more silence as Nami got her bearings. 

“Does he know?” she asked.

“No, you're the only one who does… well, there is someone else, but she doesn’t count.”

“Are you going to tell him then?”

“I don’t know, I doubt he’d accept me, and I don’t want to make things awkward and...”

I kept mumbling on, trying to make up excuses. Nami held up her hand. 

“You don’t know that until you tell him. I mean, he has an interest in men.”

I looked at her, shocked.

“How do you know that?”

Nami covered her mouth and turned her head away.

“Y-you know, um, he told me.”

“You’re lying.”

“I-I’m not.”

I latched onto her shoulders and stared at her.

“Tell me, please.” 

“Ugh, fine,” she sighed, “I caught Zoro doing ‘it’ with a man.”

“Who?”

I knew the answer. There’s only one person who it could be.

“...Luffy.”

I let go of her shoulders.

“So you know too?”

I rubbed the bridge of my nose. She grabbed onto my arm.

“You know?!”

I nodded.

“I saw them the other day. That’s what made me recognize my feelings.”

She sighed, letting out a chuckle.

“I’ve known since the beginning. When it was just me and with those two, we were on a small dinghy. They weren’t really quiet and… and I heard everything.”

Her face relaxed, as if relieved to be able to talk about her experience, but my heart sank even further.

“So, they’ve been together for a while.”

“Yes.”

I ran my hand through my hair.

“Does anyone else know?”

“I’m pretty sure Robin does, but it’s just a hunch.”

“Ah, I see.”

“But don’t get discouraged, you should still-”

The door flung open, interrupting her. Luffy and Usopp barged into the room.

“Sanji!” Luffy yelled, “Come look at this huge fish that got blown onto the deck by the storm.”

“We should cook it for dinner!” Usopp added.

I smiled and pushed myself to my feet.

“Alright let’s go take a look.”

As I was heading out, Nami grabbed my wrist. I turned to her.

“We’re not done yet,” she said.

“We can talk later,” I said, “Thank you for listening.”

I shook off her grip and followed the two out on the deck. An enormous fish, the size of a small ship, flopped on the wooden floor, struggling to breathe. Its gaping mouth opened and closed, revealing its sharp teeth. 

“Well?” Luffy asked, “Can we eat it?”

I moved closer, dragging my fingertips along its blue scales. It was cold. It was an unlucky fish, one that would have lived if that storm never happened, but now, it was going to be eaten by us. I knew I had to make it into something delicious, so its life wasn’t wasted.

“Yes, we can.”

As I moved towards its head, its black pupil, larger than me, flicked in my direction. It was staring at me. For a second, I thought it was begging me to help. It was pathetic.

Zoro came over and raised his sword. He brought it down onto the fish’s head, killing it instantly. Usopp recoiled in disgust.

“It was suffering,” Zoro said.

“Yeah, but you didn’t have to do it so harshly,” Usopp responded.

Zoro didn’t respond. He pulled out his sword. Blood bubbled out of the wound, pouring out onto the scales, masquerading the beautiful blue, and pouring onto the deck. 

I wondered if it would be better to end everything in a single strike, or if it was worth suffering to live just a bit longer. 

The fish’s dead eye stared at me. I didn’t like it.

“I’ll make something good for dinner,” I said, “and I’ll preserve the rest.”

The next day, I went to the aquarium, trying to sort everything out. The fish swam around. I stared at the seaweed, dancing back and forth, following the flow of the water. I was jealous. Being free looked so appetizing. 

A hand grabbed my shoulder. I jumped. 

“Wow, I didn't know I was that scary,” A melodious voice said.

I smiled and turned around. It was Nami. 

“The last thing you are is scary. Did you finally realize your love for me?”

She slapped the back of my head.

“No, why’d you ever think that?”

“Why else would you corner me?”

She chuckled.

“You know why. What are you going to do?” 

She leaned in closer, just enough for the sweet fragrance of her hair to reach my nose. 

“You gotta do something, you can’t keep running away.”

Her face was a few inches from mine. I tried to speak, but couldn’t.

“The tension in the air is thick. If you don’t do anything soon, it’s going to affect the morale of the crew. Tell him.”

“No.”

“Please Sanji,” her breast pressed against my arm, I gulped, “Even if you don’t want to tell him, you gotta do something, you can’t just keep on avoiding him.”

My face flushed.

“F-fine.”

“Good.”

She backed away and headed for the exit.

“Wait!” I yelled, “How should I do it? When should I do it? What do I do?”

She grinned at me.

“I don’t know, that’s up to you.”

She left the room. Sighing, I put my head into my hands and fell back into the couch. I've never been more confused. I’ve confessed to hundreds of girls, so it should’ve been easy, but whenever I thought of telling Zoro, everything became hazy.

I’ve tried to talk to him several times, but every interaction ended as an awkward stutter. 

Later that night, my restless mind kept me awake, so I went to the kitchen to cook and try to calm myself. I filled a pot up with water and turned on the heat. I watched the slow simmer grow into a boil. 

The sound of the door opening prickled the nape of my neck. I didn’t even need to turn around to know who it was - The heavy boots clunking against the wooden floor told me exactly who just entered.

I turned around and Zoro held my gaze. Time froze. My face grew to an unbearable heat. His lips quivered as he wanted to speak. Then they stopped.

“I’m hungry.”

I knew that’s not what he wanted to say, but I still played along. 

“What do you want?”

“Just make me whatever.”

My heart skipped a beat. I was nervous. I’ve cooked for him hundreds of times, but this time felt different. 

The water bubbled over, giving me the signal to pour in the rice. The rice popped in the water. It was always one of my favorite sounds.

I prepared the rest of the material for onigiri - his favorite food. I felt his piercing gaze stab into my back. The only sounds were the boiling of rice, and the audible gulps whenever he took a swig of his drink.

“I’m sorry,” Zoro said.

Those words caused me to freeze. They were the last thing I thought I would hear from his mouth. 

“About what?”

“About the other night.”

“It’s fine.”

More silence. I mixed the rice and vinegar together. After wetting my hands, softly, I cupped rice into my palms and pressed them hard together, until the rice formed into a ball. He took another swig. I continued until there was no more rice. 

“You don’t have to b-but I’ll always be here if you ever need to talk,” he mumbled, his cheeks red.

I placed seaweed on the balls, completing them. I brought the brimming plate over and placed it in front of Zoro. My heart raced when. I took a seat across from him. It was time - Nami was right, I needed to talk to him. 

“Actually, I-I do have something to tell you.”

I couldn’t believe that I was going to say those words. My lips felt numb as I spoke.

“I, um, I love you,” I whispered, my head faced downwards.

My hands trembled while my mind spun. I dreaded the thought of his answer.

“Ah, sorry, what was that? I couldn’t hear you.”

My heart skipped a beat. I looked at him, he looked at me. It was now or never - I couldn’t back out, I was in too deep.

“I lo-”

The door crashed against the wall as it swung open. Luffy, rubbing his eyes, entered the room. 

“Sannjjjjiiii, I’m hungry,” he whined.

Of course, it was him. I chuckled at the poor timing.

“I’ll make you a sandwich.”

“Thank you.”

I went back to the kitchen, my back against the two, but the window perfectly reflected the image of the two. I watched as Luffy stole a kiss from Zoro’s lips. Zoro pushed him away, his face bright red. He glanced at me, then went in and gave Luffy a deep kiss. Both of them stared at each, their eyes brimming with passion. Each had a slight grin and flushed faces. I dropped my knife. The loud clatter brought their attention to me. 

“Oi, are you okay?” Zoro asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I picked up the knife, “Your sandwich’s done.”

I brought the plate over to Luffy. Zoro watched me. I smiled over his concern - it made me happy to know he cared. 

“We can finish this conversation later if you want,” he said.

“No,” I looked at both of them, “It’s actually better if you’re both here for this.”

I took a deep breath.

“I know about your guys’ relationship, and... and It’s alright with me.”

\---

The moment I left the kitchen, Nami yanked my arm.

“Are you sure this is what you want?”

“You know you shouldn’t eavesdrop.”

Her grip tightened, her fingernails dug into my skin. I knew she could see the tears that pooled in my eyes, the ones I was trying so hard to hold back. 

“Answer me,” she said, “Won’t you regret this decision? What about your own feelings?”

I shrugged.

“Ruining my friendship with Luffy - the crew - would be more painful. All I want is to see Zoro smile.”

It was the truth. His smile was enough for me. 


End file.
